10 Reasons Why
by littlevoicex
Summary: I got bored when i was typing up my breaking dawn and came up with these so read, enjoy and review. breaking dawn- soooooo close yet sooooo far : RXR and im sorry to team jacob people - you might have a thing or two to say ;D
1. Jacob Black

10 reasons why I HATE Jacob Black

1. He interferes with destiny.

2. He makes Bella upset, therefore making Edward upset.

3. he is an egotistic maniac

4. he is fictional, so you cant really kill him (not that i would want to- that would upset bella, therefore upseting edward (also stephenie says hes like a child to her and sh emight go into depression if he 'dies' and stops writing - that would be BAAAAAD))

5. he complicates things - alot- ALOT ALOT.

6. he doesn't like Edward- what kind of idiot would not like edward

7. he thinks he's better than everyone else

8. he's a werewolf- making werewolves bad- when they used to be good

9. he breaks his promises

10. I just generally hate him.


	2. Why read twilight if you havent yet

10 reasons why you should read twilight etc

15 reasons why you should read twilight etc. – if you haven't already

They are the most amazing books in the WORLD – they are worth counting down every second until the next one comes out- so they must be good.

You will fall instantly in love with Edward/ Jacob/ Charlie?? (okay that was a joke but it is possible)

They will make you believe in love again

Stephenie Meyer is a brilliant author

They teach you that you don't have to be blonde haired and beautiful to be loved by a gorgeous guy.

They lift spirits

They will teach you to believe in vampires

The movie is coming out soon and it will be awesome, so you won't just have the books to satisfy yourself.

You get so crazily obsessed with them that when you hear the word 'lamb' you sudden jump up and shout 'THE WORD LAMB WAS IN TWILIGHT!'

You'll loose so many nights of sleep reading the books because they are so well written that you can't put them down.

You will feel like you're actually in the books – e.g. screaming/gasping/laughing when something happens, and it will completely embarrass you- not that you will/should care.

You will find yourself saying 'When I grow up I'll name my kid Alice/ Edward/ Esme/ Carlisle/ Emmett/ Rosalie/ Isabella/ some other character from the book.'

You'll also drive yourself crazy while waiting for the next book, 'Breaking Dawn' to come out, and then when that book is out, you'll be upset that the book series had to end.

You'll start to find yourself daydreaming about having Edward Cullen hum you to sleep.

You just should – believe me.


	3. my new moon playlist

A/n its like what Stephenie has done- its my ultimate playlist

**A/n its like what Stephenie has done- its my ultimate playlist **

10 songs which are perfect for new moon

Slipped away by Avril Lavigne- for when Edward has left

All fall down by OneRepublic – for when Edward leaves

Vampires will never hurt you by my chemical romance – for the Volturi

fall to pieces by Avril Lavigne for when they are on the plane coming back from Italy

Paper cut by Linkin Park for pretty much the whole book

Numb by Linkin Park - for what Edward says to bella when he leaves and then how he feels during new moon

my immortal by evanescence - just perfect

fix you by coldplay – Jacob Black

how to save a life by the fray – for the whole book

white flag- dido – I don't like this osng but the lyrics are good


	4. edward cullen

10 reasons why I love Edward Cullen

10 reasons why I love Edward Cullen

He's perfect, in every sense of the meaning

He's loves an ordinary person, even though he could have whoever

He's selfless (no matter what my stupid sister says)

He's makes my heart flutter when I hear his name

He's my first love

He's so much more genuine than Jacob black

He left Bella for her in new moon, even though he wanted to stay

He's tries to get on with Jacob black even though SOMEBODY makes that very difficult.

Sure he's jealous, but he does not portray that jealousy enough to hurt Bella

I just do :P


	5. obsessedtwilight!

15 ways you know you are obsessed with twilight…

17 ways you know you are obsessed with twilight…

When someone says any word, or sentence, or ANYTHING whatsoever that could be related to twilight, you start hyperventilating and screeching at the person who dared mention the sacred books. E.g. –walking around outside- OMG I JUST SAW A SHEEP! SHEEP HAVE LAMBS! THE WORD LAMB WAS IN TWILIGHT!! –then continuing to quote whole page with lion and lamb etc.

When you start laughing/crying/screaming at something in the books, and don't stop even when you realise you are on a train, and everyone is staring and threatening to call the police.

When you are counting down every second until breaking dawn comes out and start screaming about it. That reminds me… ARRRGGGHH 67 DAYS UNTIL BREAKING DAWN!!

When you run in front of vans thinking that Edward will save you, and you start crying when hit by said van, not because you've broken your leg, fractured you ribs and am bleeding everywhere, but because Edward did not save you. (Maybe next time…!? (smiles evilly))

When you have read twilight/ new moon/ eclipse at least 10 times, never leave them, and refuse to so much as looking at other books which you used to love.

When you used to think vampires and werewolves were mythical, but now you think everyone is a vampire/werewolf, and you think everyone can read your mind.

When you cry at the bit in new moon when Edward leaves… for the 15th time.

When you rush into your room at night, ready for bed, hoping to see Edward there.

When you are disappointed when he's not there.

When you pretend he is anyway.

When you are constantly trying to bring the books up with your friends who are now bored –GASPS- with you talking about them.

when you realise you have 6th period biology, and start hyperventilating because, even though your school is an all girls school, and you don't live in America, EDWARD MIGHT BE THERE!!

When your parents have decided you NEED to go and see a psychologist.

When you now feel dizzy when you smell blood.

When you cried for hours on end when you found out Robert Pattison is attempting to play Edward in the movie.

When you scream at anyone who even suggests that Edward is 'fictional'

When you are in prison after having killed your sister when she called Edward 'selfish'.


	6. ANNOYING JACOB!

**I did not write all of this, i got my inspiration from someone on the 'net :D**

Ten ways to annoy... Jacob

1. Call him a "mutt", "pup", "dog", or "mythological creature that is not as amazing as a vampire" whenever you are in hearing distance of him.

2. Ask him if he has super powers…

3. Then say," Oops! I'd forgotten. Only vampires do and you're only a werewolf."

4. Tell him it's a waste to try and rebuild the "Rabbit" because it could go from 1-60 in about an hour (Seriously why would anyone, ANYONE want that car??)

5. Ask him why werewolves from Harry Potter are faster, stronger, nicer, cuter, and just more awesome in general than he is.

6. When he is morphing back into a human steal his clothes.

7. Make him race against Edward……………

8. And whoever wins gets Bella (Jacob can run fast but vampires are so much faster. Not to mention Edward is the fastest vampire.)

9. Give him an invitation to Bella's wedding to Edward and then inform him that Edward made him his "Best Mutt."

10. When he sits down at the dinner table say," No dogs at the table," and make him eat from a bowl of dog food on the floor instead.


End file.
